Hello all. Still fighting with the stupid myspace. But, for now, something "diary-like", just for the sake of keeping a "true" blog. A true story.
The other day, I woke up very early (if early means 10 AM or 11, "very early" therefore means 8:00 AM). Very early indeed. I had to go to an interview in the freaking ass of this country, well, not really the ass, just somewhere far. The "interview" (I'll explain the quotations momentarily) was for a job as an editor. The interview really wasn't an interview, it was more of a test, they made me do an essay from the top of my head on a random topic, altho it wasn't really random, everyone had to write about it. So, I've never been into the ass of this country, so, even tho I woke up early, I still was late finding the (insert your curse word here) place. And there weren't any computers there to do the essay, because I was 20 minutes late. But, if there were no computers available at 10:20, and I was supposed to use it for hour and a half at least, so that computer would have been scheduled for someone for hour and a half, why was there someone else on it? I didn't understand. (hopefully u understood that last rhetorical question, if not, buy a map). And so, I waited, being the passive-aggressive, obsssessssive-compulsive that I am, being the patient human that I am, again, I waited. And waited. And waited. I got my revenge tho, everybody left, and I started my essay and the person in charge had to wait thru lunch time for me to finish. Don't get me wrong, I try to be nice to everyone, and I didn't want to just do that to that person, I just couldn't leave, and come back, I had to wait, because I had a schedule, and schedules are not to be broken when you freaking wake up VERY early at eight in the morning. And so, I finished the essay at ONE o'clock, and I hurried not because I was fond of the girl there, but because I was very hungry and I had to pee. Hopefully the essay/"interview" is good enough.
So then I had lunch at the worst Church's Chicken. Didn't finish my Pechusandwich (chicken sandwich for the hispanically-impaired), didn't finish my coleslaw, nor my sprite, the only good thing was the mashed potatoes, except for the nasty gravy.
After that I went back home. Following a random conversation with my father:
-I have a friend whose last name is spelled G-e-l-l. (All of this in Spanish, of course) How do you pronounce that in English?
-Like "gel". (as hair gel)
-But he says it is like "hell".
-Well, because G in Spanish sounds like H in English.
-But then, he should call himself "gel".
-No, because his name Gell is in Spanish, not English.
After that I almost fell asleep when he pressured me, with the help of my mother to go to the supermarket, meaning SAM's. Why? Why, of course, to push the extremely broken shopping carts. Out of the eight hundred and twenty six thousand two hundred and fifteen carts we had to get ONE that steered to the left on its own. Anyway, so, first, come the usual "come fill this form and get your sam's club credit card and we will give you this awesome thermos" shit. I distinctively and dissmisively and almost disgustedly shook my head in negation (redundacy right there). The lady finally said: "it's free". I walked away, not looking back: "keep your free shit, you're not getting me, not now, nor never". But when I looked back, she had my mother on her paws. *Joel rolls eyes and stares at the flat tv screens*. Yeap, they were playing The Shaggy Dog, seemed like a neat, but unmemorable movie.
So we head towards the detergents. And suddenly I hear coos. But not baby coos. No. Bird coos. There were turtledoves (tórtolas) on the roof of the huge warehouse. On the INSIDE. And I thought, "hmm, interesting, I wonder how they feed". And my imagination ran wild picturing the employees hunting the birds with the rifles from the gun aisle (altho there is no gun aisle, but still). I also knew that it was just a matter of time when the worst would happen.
We were supposed to get emergency stuff, totally needed things. We ended up with 2 full shopping carts (the second one, even more screwed up than the first, I even compared it to a rodeo bull.... yeah, it was that bad). So, I have to stop and say that I deterred from my duties as cart pusher in two moments of the early evening, the first when we went thru the spices aisle. There's just something about spices in cups that draws my attention. To think that there is so much flavor to savor inside them. And to see the translations of the spices: Cumin=Comino, Basil Leaves=Albahaca, Bay Leaves=hojas de Laurel, Anís=Aniseed, now I know what Emeril is talking about on his cooking show. I also wonder what they (americans) have for Adobo, if there is such a thing outside Puerto Rico (I didn't find it in Orlando, surely you can, tho). Adobo is like a seasoning, or essence for meats, poultry, and fish (and whatever else for that matter) just so we're clear. And then, that's when it happened. Plap! I heard it. Clear. Like spit from a very high window on the sidewalk. One of the birds shat. Thankfully it fell 2 feet away from me, so I was lucky. I knew then that I had to keep moving, not to keep myself in the same position for too long... The second time I deterreded from my duties, was when I went to the electronics area (again), which is also next to the book area. Why are there so many religious books and self-help in SAM'S??? Why? So many bibles, it seemed illegal, even blasphemous... Anyway, I found the latest Stephen King book (CELL) at a cheaper price than when I got it at Borders... damn it, and the hardcover Harry Potter, also cheaper than when I bought it at the Orlando International Airport. Sniff. I want to go back to Orlando..... Ok, I digressed a little there. Although the digression was founded in the fact that this story is almost over, because after that nothing eventful happened, except that ONE lobster tail was 27 dollars! (the pound was 26, and this one was like, what?, a pound and a gram?) I don't even have to say that we didn't dine fine that night. And, yeah, we bought no sugar added bite-sized candies (cakes, brownies, cookies), which are not that bad, I have to admit. And that's it. OOh, wait! I saw a poster of the Laguna beach cast where the clothes were. They have their own brand now? WTF.
So that was my day, the other day. Oh, no, wait! After that, I got this mega-ultra-super-hyper-head-ache that had me squirming in my bed and speaking in tongues (probably French). (blasphemous! I say, blasphemous!) Ok, I need to go.
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